Life goes on

These few days i'm kinda screwed up...
No idea why is it so...
I just need someone to talk, to share,
I dowan hiding up everything in me, it's sucks...
Life without true friends are suck...
No jokes, no laughter, no life....
I hate sitting alone inside a room,
without anything bothering me...
I feel like i'm a dead meat...
Well, this weekend, i'm gonna back to Malacca again...
Not that excited like i used to for my past two sems,
I feel that's just normal,
To see my brothers,
There is only two people i really share all my secrets,
First, my brothers, youngest brother especially, he's only 8yrs old...
Second, my true brothers, i have 4 true brothers, they know all as well...
Somehow, i hardly see them, so no one i can talk to...
But, only when i talk with my youngest bro, feels relieve
he doesn't know anything, but he acts he knows...
Sometimes, i just envy so much of his childhood,
No worries, no sadness.....

Few days ago, my mum ask me to talk with her,
but i didn't respond much,
i answered her with , "o..."
that's it...
she looked worried,
she added, why is it you seem not interested in talking to mummy anymore??
i feel bad at that moment,
Not i dowan to talk, it's just that i don't know how to start telling you,
I'm sorry mum, but i love you.....